It's been a while

There was a bit of family drama and I had to go home to Ohio to visit my family. While I was there I was kind of traumatized and just not really "present." I went alone with the two little kids, ages 3 and 5, and staying in a hotel with a 3 and 5 year old is not and easy venture. Visiting the ICU is also not an easy venture, especially when my daughter, the 3 yo, is puking.... So needless to say it was a very stressful time. The funny thing is during that time I stopped taking all my medications. No Synthroid and no medication for my PTSD... and the funny thing is....wait for it.... I felt better! I felt clear headed, not sore....I felt like I was me again! What an incredible feeling! So recently I started taking the Synthroid again and guess what... i feel like shit! Pure and utter shit. My joints feel so so sore that I can hardly move by the end of the night, literally. Headaches... brain fog... the whole shebang. So this morning I decided to not take the Synthroid... and I felt a bit better, I was still a little sore but nothing as debilitating as I have been feeling. I did take a Raw Thyroid supplement, which has T3 as well as T4, so I think I am going to try taking that and see how I feel after a few weeks. i know deep down my body desperately needs the T3. I also started doing a lot of supplements. First and foremost being Vitamin C... it can be very therapeutic in high doses, so I am trying to get up to a hefty dose, perhaps 3 times a day. I also started Niacin, B12, potassium, and I plan on getting some iodine, I just have to check into it to make sure I can take that with Hashis. I also manages to gain about 8-10 pounds,I didn't really stay on the scale long enough to see the final number, it just wouldn't stop and I got upset. I have been feeling so down in the dumps about the weight issue. I started the gluten free diet, and I have been doing pretty well with it, but I think that I am really going to start trying to eat salads at least twice a day, but I really don't think that it is the amount of calories that I am putting into my body... it's just my freaking evil thyroid... I just want to feel pretty again, i want to feel normal and not obese. I am sick of the rolls that have become my belly... I mean for fucks sake there was a time before all of this stuff that my waist was 25 inches! now I don't even want to know....